Oh If I Could Fly

     Have you ever gotten news that made you feel as though your feet would leave the ground and lift you away? As though you would simply float off of planet earth and live amongst the stars? That’s exactly the way I felt on Friday, January 19, 2024 at 11:49am; like if I could, I would fly away.  My visa had been approved. 

    Knowing know how it all played out, I suppose I feel a little silly remembering the ways I doubted. I knew God was in control, and I knew His will would be accomplished, in fact, I was even
certain that I would, eventually, attain my visa. But I was near certain, without doubt, it would not be this time. 

    My first visa application had been with the Atlanta consulate, that was the appropriate consulate for a resident of Tennessee. For reasons unknown, they rejected my application and told me I could reapply if I wanted to. I was next advised to try applying with the DC consulate. Because of the time frame for my paperwork, once the decision to apply with DC had been made, I had about 3 hours to get it all to the post office and sent out since some of my paperwork was close to expiring and it was a weekend. So I rushed around for those three hours, went to the post office and sent it all out. Truth be told, this was where I doubted. I so was certain I would be denied again, it never even occurred to me that it would be granted this time. I left the post office, sat in my car, and sobbed. 

    I hadn’t had time to check and check and recheck all my paperwork this time, I filled out the application form so fast I had put a wrong answer in one of the boxes, and I knew it. There was a possibility that I was missing a document because this consulate had a different list of requirements than the other one, and I wasn’t sure about one of documents. And, online it said that anyone outside of the DC jurisdiction would be denied. So I was feeling pretty hopeless, but doing what I had been advised to do. Praying the whole time that God would help my faithlessness. 

    It’s pretty hard to ask people to help you pray for something you don’t believe in, but that’s what I did. I knew I would get a visa, eventually, but I had serious doubts about this being the route that would succeed. And yet, as I sent out email after email asking people to help me pray (and you did) I wasn’t sure what the answer was going to be as I begged God to give me wisdom to know what to do and grace to bear the uncertainty. 

    I think God wants us to know He can work miracles! I believe God chose to give me my visa through this application simply because I didn’t think it could happen. I voiced my doubts and God heard them, He chose to work the impossible. People prayed, and God answered. No one knew how I was feeling about the application, so no one but me knew just how incredible it was to me to read the email on Friday morning that it had been granted. 

   I was attempting, for the 3rd time that morning to check the status of my visa. There is a website where you can  track what part of the process your paperwork is in. I had not been able to track my paperwork since it had arrived at the consulate (another reason I thought it was being denied). Friday, I decided I would try to email them. I hadn’t reached out before, and wasn’t really sure if they would answer me or when, but I decided to try. I sent an email asking for a status update on my application. Within the hour I had received a response, 

‘It was placed in the mail today; please allow 1-2 days for the USPS tracking to become available.’ 

    Well, I was floored. It was already processed? There’s no way it was approved that fast. It had only been 11 days. So I quickly typed out a response, ‘Was it approved?’ And sent it. With in 5 minutes I had an answer, 

‘Yes, the visa was granted.’    

    Friend, I cried again. My God whom I serve, had worked the impossible, regardless of my lack of faith. Regardless of what I thought I knew, He had done a miracle. My visa had been approved. 

    I don’t know what it is that you are doubting God on. I know there is something, not because you are a terrible person, but you are human, just like me. And we try to logic our way out of things and think our way through our problems and troubles. We think that we can figure out exactly what God is doing and when and what the timeline will look like. Well, we can’t. Even when it all looks one way, we serve a God who supersedes the laws of government, nature and time. I share this (somewhat embarrassing) story of my lack of faith, because I hope to help you see, that God is able to work the impossible, even when our faith is too small. God is bigger than my giants, and God is bigger than my lack of faith. 

    Lord willing, I will be moving to Brazil in a couple of weeks, I have much packing, and preparing to do. I covet your prayers these next few weeks as I will be in the whirlwind that is transition. Thank you so much for all your prayers and encouraging words! 

God bless! 

Beca (+Ray)